The Missing Menu – a new flash fiction available in either podcast format or in text format! This flash fiction covers the thoughts and musings of some…thing as it’s sitting down to a meal.
Posting this was my challenge – and finally, with the help of some Ultra Sour sativa and playing “Eye of the Tiger” on a loop, I got it online. Although the tenth repeat the bird got pissed and started squawking in protest.
Why the delay in posting new creative? Well…I’m working on other stuff offline, and my laptop was going senile. So June was a write off as I tried to work around it. Fortunately a friend who works at Best Buy suggested I switch my hard drive out for a solid-state drive. And whoa, boy! Behaves about the same, but faster on startup. Unfortunately, while they were able to preserve a lot of my files, my desktop and any apps I need to download (Firefox, Audacity, GIMP) had to be updated.
Which also caused some issues. Yet, I persevered! True, I had to sigh and quote Dorothy Parker “What fresh Hell is this?” but…I’m also going to look at the Library of Stories page and think about how I could better organize it…maybe a table of contents? We’ll see.
Days 10-12 of the Alone Plague Journal are now up. How would you like it? A text version? The podcast on my Podcasts page? Maybe through Podbean? It’s your choice, but if you could either follow me here, on social media, or even better, donate to my Ko-fi account so I can continue to maintain my parrot in kibble and seeds, that’d be swell.
Besides that, I finally figured out the problem with a video version of one of my stories. I’m taking the audio from my stories and posting it into a PowerPoint presentation which I convert to video, so I can also post to YouTube; but it’s a bit slower. Yet, if you’ve not yet heard my one story “Seeds of Time” you can click on the hyperlinked title and watch it now on YouTube.
Latest in the fictional serial journal of someone experiencing the COVID-19 pandemic in Calgary Alberta. The framing device is that this is from some kind of museum display 50 years in the future. Text version here or for audio, go to Podcasts (note, podcast also available on Podbean).
I also add some comments about the writing process…I’ve said it before, but sometimes perfectionism is the enemy of creativity. It’s a work in progress after all.
What else…oh, it’s Diva’s 16th birthday today. She’s getting all sorts of treats (nuts, seeds, fruit, veggies, birdie bread) and of course, lots of attention. And she’s being such a good girl. Look for yourself:
Karenpocalypse, or Dicks Demise is now online! So today I decided to list off the ways you can access this new original story about why you should be nice to essential workers like retail staff all the time: – Evankayne.com – either Library of Stories for the text, or Podcasts for the podcast – Podbean – here’s the link to this story specifically, and the link to my main Podbean site with other stories. Also, pay what you can to support me by visiting my Ko-fi account – it’s that green “buy me a coffee” button located on the side (desktop) or the bottom of the page (or you can click this link).
As for the whole “Karen” meme, first off I’m including “Dicks” whenever I discuss Karen behavior. Why? Well, “Dick” behavior was there first. By behavior, I mean the self-centered “it’s all about me and you making me happy” behavior some people exhibit towards people working in the service industry or arts (so, retail staff, doctors, nurses, artists, actors, restaurant staff, etc.).
The “Karens” and the “Dicks” of this world want what they want now. If they’re caught in a mistake, they never admit they were wrong. They’re always the victim of bad service. And they ALWAYS have bad service. When I worked at Shell, I arranged a celebratory dinner for 100+ people in our lunchroom. It was transformed into a dining hall with white tablecloths, silverware and china. The food was amazing from start to finish. And yet, a “Karen” whined that her dessert was a little dry, therefore her entire meal was ruined. She was quickly put in her place by some other coworkers and myself, but you got the impression that she didn’t change her opinion, she just learned in this situation and with these people, she should keep her thoughts to herself.
Look, sometimes you have to make a complaint. But treat the person to whom you unload like a friend or family member you respect. Ask for other solutions. Yes, if you’re not satisfied with the answer at one level, do not immediately “ask for a manager”. Try “you’ve been helpful, but can I see if the manager has any other solutions? That way you can get back to helping other people.”
If the answer is “No” accept that. You could try calling corporate or the owner, but try weighing the cost of your time versus how much this purchase or service cost you. Because I feel, and I’ve seen that essential workers have zero patience for dick behaviors and karen entitlements. When you ask “may I speak to a manager” you may get the answer of “No”. When you snipe “Well, I’ll never shop here again” you may get “Good, because you’re banned from this store.”
We’re all under a lot of stress. Be nice. Now and in the future.
Today I threw in three days. Also, on the podcast ONLY I have a short note on the writing and creation of this journal and how it has changed from when I first started writing this fictional journal. The Podcasts page has the links to the text (with – once again – bonus songs to play if you prefer to read rather than listen).
Today’s flash fiction has a fantasy flavour – The Sorcerer’s Balance Sheet – is available in podcast and in text format.
Story size differences were explained to me as such: a novel is a house with a yard, furniture and occupants; a short story is the description of the activity and items in one of the rooms; and a flash fiction is walking past that room and glancing in as you go past. Today, we’re looking into a magical professor’s office.
In popular science fiction, any time they have problems with the technology which allows the crew to travel vast interstellar distances in the blink of an eye, it’s usually fixed by the end of the episode. Yet, I’ve a feeling when things go wrong in space, they’ll go wrong in ways we can’t fathom. If you like my creations, come back to EvanKayne.com or my Podbean page on a regular basis, and support me on my Ko-fi account.
Alrighty – a new podcast in our lovely Podcasts section: Left Foot, Right Foot. I read off a story I’ve previously posted in the Library of Stories which gives a look at the solution to crash landing on an alien world if you’ve got powered armour. Hint – it involves a lot of walking, and madness.
I was going to post another story I wrote over the weekend inspired by grocery shopping in the time of the plague, but I realized that it needs a few weeks to ripen. True, all my stories are “works in progress” but sometimes I need to put something new out of my mind for a few weeks while my brain gets some needed distance.
As ever, if you like what you see, follow me here, on social media (today linking to my Twitter) or on Podbean…but I’d really appreciate it if you tipped me by pressing on the Green “Buy me a coffee” button to go to my Ko-fi account and donate what you can.
Tomorrow, between taking the next chapter on my Gale SEO course, I will also (spoiler) post Day 3 and 4 of the Alone Plague Journal.
Alrighty, I’ve posted another original flash fiction in the Library and read it so it’s also a podcast. I guess this makes it episode 4. I’m still learning….I’ve got the podcasts connected to Spotify, Google Play and I think iTunes. That last one is weird because on the Podbean end it’s showing some activity from Apple, but yet I can’t get it to load my feed when I do it through my Apple ID. Something to do with image size, but I may try again tomorrow.
Besides the flash fiction and podcast reading of it, here’s a bonus feature – last Friday (March 27) I had a bit of a panic attack, and forced myself to read a description from The Anti-Nihilist trope description page from the TVTropes website and offer my thoughts on it and Existentialism, given the current COVID-19 pandemic. I read it on Facebook Live because – as I live alone – I needed someone to make me accountable to work through this freakout. So while it’s on my Facebook, here’s the YouTube video. Watch for me saying “absurdity” and the bird agreeing with a “raawwr!”